I have added parkour to GTA 5, and also accidentally turned on like 20 mods I forgot I'd installed

Today's article is about ParkourV, but it is also about the vast graveyard of mods I have hitherto infected Grand Theft Auto 5 with and which then did not work. Did you know I at some point tried to install some sort of dating mod? I'd forgotten, but then there it was, asking me precisely how I would like to rizz up a babe as I initiated a frontflip from the roof of an 80-storey building.

Why? Because to make ParkourV work, I had to update my installation of ScriptHookVDotNet, one of those fundamental building blocks of modding on GTA, a bit like the Skyrim Script Extender for Skyrim. So now we live in a world in which I am constantly hitting keys and accidentally reanimating the corpses of mods I had installed and written off months ago. That's the world we have now and we're just gonna keep living in it.

Anyway. Parkour. The thing is, you see, GTA 5 is not really designed for parkour. Franklin, Trevor and Mike don't have the points of articulation for it. Attempting to do flips, then, just sort of rotates your entire body below the diaphragm while your head and chest area remain bolt upright, rigid in such a way that you could feasibly fly a flag from your own thorax.

Which looks odd. Nevertheless, it is pretty fun to scoot and roll your way through Los Santos. At one point, I attempted a double frontflip in the middle of a part of the map that had been deleted for some reason. It didn't quite work out, and I ended up colliding with and possibly killing a man in a fursuit.

My technique requires work.